not like i want to offend anyone or what.
but blah la you. BLAH. since you want your june holidays take it ah.
do you think i enjoy sitting in the stuffy art room with you rambling by my side. myy goshies. i rather be in the comfort of my own home and paint my work nicely while enjoying ice cream or smth.
so yeah, as much as you don't enjoy it, WE DON'T EITHER. its not like we have any choice actually.... and its your duty to stay with us as an art teacher anws. plus you vanished for a good long period the other time. time to pay back i guess?
btw you have no ideaa how much time you've taken away from me. time to do stuff i really want, time to revise my other subjects, time to spend time with beebeeeeee. so don't be selfish yes?

---------------------------------------------------------

o level mother tongue was okay~ aircon hall = shiok.
i hope i do well :D

i'm missing bee manymanymany. can't wait for friday~

i love freddie mercury ah~
i like the way he dances when he sings.
especially the part at 1.37minutes.
so much passion. so much drive. my idol wooots~
if only he was still alive. the BEST ever.



omg the energyyyy~



aaand
i miss baby D:

LOL

hah this is damn cute.
now doing math practices. my gosh~

*brain explodes*

those ceiling fans spin
we both let out cheeky grins
your head in the hollow of my shoulder
i wanna have you closer

how does your hand fit mine
and your body so fine
you bring me in
just make me sin

i'll run for miles and miles
just to see you smile
no matter what we'll be together
just you and me, forever

i remember those bus rides
with you by my side
how your head leans over
i just wanna have you closer

i don't care what, i don't care who
cause my love for you is always true
i'm serious, you don't have a clue
of how much i really love you

you make me smile whenever i'm down
and when you're sad i don't mind being a clown
cause all i want is to see your eyes
sparkle, it gives me so much drive

when you're lying next to me its so divine
i feel my heart slowly up to clouds up high
i'm here for you, don't feel shy
just lose yourself and give it one more try

we can talk for hours
i even give you flowers
i'll keep you warm
protect you from the storm

to be continued..

sudden songwriting inspiration in class today :D like duh, song's about someone special :D
photos up in facebook.
my L1R5 is 24. lol want to go ITE also cannot.
had lotsa fun with bee today :DDD

i feel so peaceful~
i am peaceful when my stomach is full!
if you wanted to pick a fight with me i would just wave *gay wave* and say "haaaaaii~"

wahahaah life is peaceful and serene. i dont like to make enemies or pick up fights anymore :)))
meiling and huijia, please dont fight anymore, cause brotherhood is stronger than anything else!
i bet meiling was just concerned of you, huijia, thats why she bothers to talk to you la. so don't blame her. peace upon the world!

today i saw people running at the parade square lol. weird punishment for being late for school.
omg mother tongue o levels on monday! can't wait. wheeeeheee. aircon aircon aircon.
o levels edging nearer! omgomgomg study study study.

now, i'm in love more than i ever was! ahhhh~
*makes shiok face*
pokemon car!


~ floats away like seaweed~

i really don't know what to blog.
but i love you la. and i'm happy.

just a simple, genuine, sincere, true, honest post.

just like simple, genuine, sincere, true and honest jach.
shaa~





- edit
my gf is soooooooooooooooooooooo wonderful.

haiz. hidayat was right. trust no one but yourself.
so what if were born alone into this world? it was meant to be. you die alone anyways.

now i get what he's driving at.
maybe it was a bad time to quit smoking.

very lazy.
very tired.
very slack.


very in love

from meiling's blog
"To jach: I hope you do well for your up coming o's. There's still lots of time! And after that, Please devote all your time to our friendship! Okay Qiu li? HAHA! I miss my band mates. Though we're no longer so close. But still in contact. I hope we'll never lose each other. Because you made up my drumset! Leo's the high-hat, Jach's the tom, Huijia's the bass, and i'm the snare. You guys were like the best moment of my life! Thank you all! Let's see how've far we've come! Now that we're all busy with life, Leo with her poly life, Jia with her dragonboat training, Jach mugging for o's plus me and my working life. I know deep in our hearts, Everything is kept within. All the memories and joy. We went through thick and thin, Tears and blood. Nothing had gone to waste. Many times we quarrel over the slightest thing. But we never fail to resume our friendship by overnight. All these make up my teen, my life. Thank you all for these. We'll crosspath again i believe, and the group would be back to what it use to be.. Just like before."


i love you guys :) i really do.
those times with you guys were really the most memorable times of my life. and will always be the most memorable.
i remember everytime we hung out together, at jurong entertainment, west coast fountain, during random things and playing arcade :)

i know i had a bad quarrel with leo and huijia about money, then we drifted apart. but i really miss you guys and i'm really sorry. i really hope you guys can forgive me. maybe i'm just too cowardly to say it face to face with you guys, but i really mean it. after my olevels, i'll really devote my time to catching up with you guys, as meiling said :)
can't wait for my olevels to be over :)

i can't believe i'm so lucky to have met you guys, to share our lives. each of us come from different backgrounds, but we came together as brothers :)
you guys were the ones who really understood me, and we really had so much in common.
from being complete strangers to building a bond so close, you guys are irreplaceable :)
i really hope we can all come together again, as one :) the four of us~ together again :)



ahhhh. i feel slightly happier now :)


but doesnt hide the fact that i'm PISSED OFF at somebadaye~
but thank you meiling and the other people for talking to me :)

today was napfa test. i ran for 30 mins thereafter. my gosh my knee hurts like fuck.
legs cramped now :) but shiiooookk.
the red lines are my routes. did it in about 30minutes. woots not bad i figure.



26 days~

i still remember how we first met :)

- four months

went for pinkdot yesterday, i got a little angry the night thereafter so i didnt bother to blog.
here i am~

i want to help in causes to make same sex marriages legal in singapore. i've never thought of myself marrying a guy. never ever. i always thought i wanted to fly off to switzerland or somewhere that same sex marriages are legal.
i want my right to love, to be able to kiss my loved one in public without facing scrutiny of the public's eye, to conform to society's norms.

smile if you're gay~ photos in facebook tadah.

4months coming real soon! time passes so fast when i'm with you :)
i still think of the time that we were lying down at going om. seems so long ago but always vivid in my memory :)

WE DIDN'T BRUSH OUR TEETH!

OMG SO COUPLY WOOOOOTS



*RUNS AROUND IN CIRCLES~*

bleah last night wasn't a good night, can't be bothered to talk about it.
tolerance is key! woots i have to have BALLS OF STEEL to take all these emotional beatings.

i want muscles! muscles muscles woooots. i want to strap weights to my legs and arms of something. MUSCLES MUSCLESSSSSSSSS.
i want to get back to my training regime like last time and stop being lazy blaaah.

i'm waiting to eat sushi yay. home-made with sistaa

today was a great day!
went to school at the usual time (no chance of getting the exam time wrong and running to school)
english compre was pretty easy. i still had time to draw my extended family tree.
it was HUGE. i threw away the paper tho. i counted, in my dad's side of the family tree alone, there were like 50 over people, 27 guys and 20 something girls i think.
and about 5 of my cousins alr have 2 kids or more, and the youngest cousin the the whole extended family tree (both mom's side and dad's side) is... ME. yes me. the closest is about 19 i think. i'm not that close to her anyway. childhood memories *shudders* some of my cousins i don't even know their names. lol i just know its the wife or husband of some familiar face. oh wells :)

thereafter went to walk around whitesands with debster and darren eng while waiting for bee to arrive. ate macs and went to safra to play pool and photohunt :) someone took our top score place (bitch!) baby knows how to play pool now and pwn me :) this meaaaans i'm good enough to actually teach someone sucessfully wahahahaas.

the piggy went to class while i went home to take a shower. mom was sleeping so i took the opportunity to sneak out silently (muahaha)
back to tp then went to play pool again with baby! she won me D:
off to home thereafter :)

i love spending time with bee. yeah i know i spend alot of your money ah piggy. like your allowance for one person has to be split into two for this pig here. and to pay for my food all since my mom doesn't give me money anymore.
i promise! i will make it up to you when i start working :) i'll treat you well, everything you want i'll get for you :) cause you're my world, my everything :)

woooooots life is wonderful ah sia~

you want me to take back those tears i've cried?
would you try to revive this heart that died?

what's done can't be undone,
just like this song will never be sung
now its to late to turn back the time
you can't undo your crime,
you stole my heart
tore it apart
now its too late,
cause its been scarred.



a little something for illusiveartist :) hope he reads it

wrote this a few days back, now i'm as happy as a lark~

shiats ah just now i thought my paper was at 1230, so i slacked at home. who knows after i checked my timetable its 12pm. fuck man i ran all the way to school. shitty feeling. i forget everything i read laaa feck.
chem's dead. now i need to worry about my art D:

went to slack with zafrul hidayat liangying lester reub sheep donn and brandon at white sands just now, then to get baby's sport shoes. blah so damn bloody hot. now i'm comfortably at home woots~
just waiting for bee to get back from cca~


i've been thinking about life, how bee talks to me about relationships and stuff. i've never bothered to think about how to be, i just take things as they come. even if i plan, in the end i won't follow what i've planned. two words to describe me - boh chup. heck care

blah i can't wait to finish my o levels, get into poly and have some fun. work will be really fun!!! and i want to introduce muaythai into temasek poly hopefully. i wonder who are enthusiasts in temasekpoly alrd. i cant wait to earn money, to get my own car or bike or some sort of vehicle, then my own house~ ahhh shiok.

but i feel like i don't want to grow up. i remember eating by myself when i was young, in the kitchen alone for long hours talking to myself.
i would taste the food on my plate, one by one and comment to myself, as if i was a food critic. i would talk to myself before i went to bed, pretending my bolster was my girlfriend :D
those were the silly things i did, and those were the times i really was carefree, with so much free time to do whatever i want and really think about what i want in the future. seems like when you grow up you have less time to appreciate things, food is often gobbled down, you tend to fall asleep once your head touches your pillow.
the older you get the faster time runs out and the more it scares me. however, the journey is important, and its all about who you spend your time with.

and i can't wait to spend my life with bee :) you may think its to early to say, but i think i really will never ever be able to forget bee. being her is such a different experience, it tugs so hard on my heartstrings but in the end all that matters is me being able to be next to her, with her head on my shoulder and hand in mine, i feel like its all that matters, i feel like i'm on top of the world.
arguements and quarrels are inevitable, but being together with her its nothing i've ever felt before. call it cliche but i think its love!
hopefully all goes ACCORDING to plan!~

:) went to bee's house yesterday.
her bro in law came back and i had to pretend to be invisible.
baked brownies with fiona that turned out more like hard choc cake and biscuits lol.
watched saw 3 and lazed around~
her sis came back and i have to run from the balcony to the living room then back to the kitchen. my god scary o.o
after that off to east coast park :) no wind to fly a kite and i have no idea how to anyways.
built our sandcastle, mr turtle :) shiok ahhh~
and i love the changkol that i found near the sand castle area :)
went to eat chicken wings and stingray thereafter yay~

this is a happy post~ time for me to eat something before i got to school for my exam at 12plus.
i need to execute my take-sport-shoes-for-bee mission later in the afternoon bleah.
then its home to stone again :(

tmr i start at 8 end at 940! and and thursday i start at 1120 woots.
exam timings are so shiokk. friday LAST PAPER. art my gosh o.o

photos up on facebook!!!! wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee~

ps, happy mother's day :)

haiz. i don't know what to do.


*weeeze*

/edited
i love this song lol. its been stuck in my head for days since brandon showed me the video!



nobody nobody but you~ *clap clap, clap*

i'm happy now :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD



HAHAHAHA I'M SUPER HAPPY NOW

she's my love :)

hmm lets reflect upon my midyear examinations.
practical was a mess, cause nothing happened for the chemistry one. but physics was pretty okay.
thereafter was eng and chin paper 1, both were okay.
then math paper 1 and 2 were both rubbish, social studies and history were okay.
literature's tokillamockingbird was shit, and who's life was pretty okay.
aaand mother tongue paper 2 was weird shit.

upcoming are eng paper 2, which i predict is a killer, chem and phys papers which i think i'll flop phys but chem will be pulled down by practical.
so only my humanities are okay, the rest are just BLAH! :DDDDDDDDDD

still got time, better buck up. SOMEONE'S birthday is coming soon, not very soon kinda soon but yes, soon to me. time to save no more eating only starving. i hope my mother gives me much money. at least the usual allowance i used to have ahhh.

now my sister's teacher's friends are doing project and talking about restaurant city. well i guess teachers are humans after all :)
i need to go think about my art midyear paper or else i think i'll just ignore it and continue on my o levels one and flung my mid year art.

relationship has been pretty conflicting lately, i hope everything will turn out for the best D:
*fingers crossed*

torturing ah tortureeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

i don't know why i lashed out at you like that. i don't even know what the fuck i'm doing ah.
no one treated you like i do, maybe cause the only other person you were with was trisha.
fuck ah its the same fucking issue over and over and over again. i'm a different human! no one ever treated you like i did. no one told me in my face countless fucking times to "fuck off!".
i don't enjoy being called bitch or asshole or dumbshit.
i message you to ask you if you're okay, i'm CONCERNED okay. then i get replies like "i don't feel like talking to you".
that "fuck off" was the last straw. its a vicious cycle!
i enjoyed the past few days so much, it was like heaven, i felt in love, i felt loved and i was loving you. then the same thing happens again.
i don't even know how i feel. just the same dead feeling. like there's a space in my chest cavity.
why're you angry anyways? i don't get it.
you keep asking me to leave you, i can never bring myself to do it. i don't want to go through the same thing over again. i love you, i just need you to know how i feel when you do the things you do.
why can't you bring yourself to leave me as well? so it seems to me.

arggggghhhh i just want to sleep and wake up and find everything's back to normal.

i feel like stewie sometimes.

just do something bad and get a real good thrill and in the end become sad.
*wallows in self pity*

today was a real hot and boring day. it rained in the morning but i ended up being in an oven for the rest of the day.

baby is wearing skinnies! *ohhhmyyyyyyy*

i'm so nice to help you cook rice and in the end all i get is a scolding.
at least i helped you right? at least i didn't leave it for you to do it yourself when you get back from work.
everyone makes mistakes and its not like i flinged rice on the floor on purpose.
everytime i do something good i get scolded.
everytime its not my fault i get wronged.
everytime i do something good it doesn't get recognized, neither do you give a fuck about any good i do.
i'll always just be seen in your eyes as useless, as you always say it.
some useless good for nothing that can't achieve anything in life.
did it ever occur to you that it actually hurts when i get something like that from my own mother.


when i feel insecure, your name never ever surfaces in my mind.
i never turn to you for help cause i know you'll never.
never once have you praised me.
never once have i ever got a comforting hug from you.

i grew up without love.

shaa see how far i've grown.

i realised i've deleted all my old nerdy looking photos.
today shall be a study math day.
then cycling later WOOTS :DD
baby is at her cousin's house teaching about vectors and probability.


a poem is good
makes you say woot
at the end of each post
just for a little hoot

yesterday~
went to the botanic gardens with bee :D
found our way there, and saw real swans leh! REAL SWANS.
walk walk walk and walk and bought drinks etc.
walked to the visitor centre, stupid woman says saga trees are right near the entrance which was probably 30minutes away.
walked BACK to the entrance area and went to ask the people at the botanic centre or dunno what.
fed the fish in the pond some stinky fish food in capsules
and we had a nice woman who pointed the correct direction to us.
walked baaaaaack to the direction we came from and found the freaking saga tree.
but with NO SEEDS. so yup in the whole botanic gardens THERE IS ONLY ONE SAGA TREE.
$#%*^@

but we got to feed the swan with our hotdog buns right bee :D
and the turtle/terrapin and the greedy ass fishes.
team effort babeh! :D


aaand today the very holy girl met up with me again~
queued for the redemption thing cause the holy girl lost her ezlink.
off to cityhall~ marinasquare for tomyumyumyum then walk around
saw a few retarded people on the igallop thing doing aerobics or stuff like that.
went to pasir ris to study :D so guai.



two whole days i've spent with you
the time we've spent, so fruitful
filled with laughter filled with fun
we even got to eat tom yum.